October 29, 2008

Rock You Like A Hurricane

Hurricanes are already destructive enough. There is no reason for us to make them even MORE destructive by giving already established human names to the storms. The hurricanes are not only causing physical damage, but also damage to those names. (NO JOKE SECTION) Hurricane Katrina was terrible. Nobody will ever name their kid Katrina again. The name has been tainted forever.

Who's idea was it to name the hurricanes with already established human names, anyway? If a hurricane named "Johnny" ever wreaks havoc upon the coastline, I can't help but feel partially responsible. So here is my proposal for the latest trend: Start naming hurricanes for things that are already terrible. This way, no new names are ruined. For example, when Hurricane Syphilis wipes out an island in the Caribbean, no harm has been done to "syphilis." It already is a word that has a bad reputation.

Also, the more menacing name could potentially cause people to be more prepared, and in the end save lives. Which of the following strikes more fear into your heart: Hurricane Ricky or Hurricane Homocide?

So I urge you, trendsetters, write to the National Weather Service and urge them to stop ruining perfectly good names. After all, it could be Hurricane (insert your name here) that comes through next. You don't want everybody to hate you, right?

Sign that this trend has caught on: Hurricane Starvation
Has this trend caught on yet? No

1 comment:

Billy Budapest said...

Would the name Ebenezer count? It's a person's name but a somewhat infamous one. Plus, no one really names babies Ebenezer much anymore these days.